You're not afraid of failing. You're afraid of becoming too big.

You know what's crazy? I've been sitting with this realization lately that's completely shifted how I see fear.

We always talk about fear of failure, right? Like that's the big monster under the bed that keeps us from going after what we want.

But I don't think that's actually what stops most of us.

Think about it - failure isn't that scary when you really look at it. We've all failed at stuff. We survived. We got back up. Some of us have failed spectacularly and lived to tell about it.

What's way scarier is the thought of becoming someone our friends and family don't recognize anymore. Of outgrowing relationships that have defined us. Of stepping into a power that might make others uncomfortable.

That's the real fear - not that we'll try and fail, but that we'll succeed and transform.

Because when you really step into your power, things change. People react differently to you. Some fall away. Some get weird about it. Some try to pull you back to who you used to be.

The matrix doesn't just keep us trapped with external stuff. It uses our attachments to our current identity and relationships. It knows that most of us will choose comfort and belonging over expansion and sovereignty.

I've watched this play out so many times - people right on the edge of a breakthrough who suddenly pull back. Not because they're afraid it won't work, but because they're afraid it will.

The entrepreneur who sabotages right before things take off.

The artist who never releases their most powerful work.

The healer who keeps their gifts small and manageable.

It's like we have this unconscious ceiling on how big we allow ourselves to become.

And I get it. Becoming more means letting parts of your old self die. It means releasing identities you've carried for years. It means stepping into the unknown of who you might be on the other side of that transformation.

That's way scarier than failure.

The matrix knows this. It's why the programming runs deep - stay small, don't rock the boat, don't outshine others, know your place.

But what if the discomfort of expansion is actually the feeling of freedom? What if those growing pains are just your true self breaking out of a cage that was always too small?

I don't have all the answers, but I'm starting to think that what we call "fear of failure" is often just a more acceptable way of saying "I'm afraid of who I might become if I really let myself be free."

What do you think? Have you ever held back not because you were afraid of failing, but because you were afraid of becoming too big? Let me know in the comments.

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